That is what Tony Soprano shouted at the end of this past Sunday’s fourth-to-the-last episode of the all-time best show in the history of television, The Sopranos.
It’s also what I was mumbling to myself a couple of hours later.
Earlier in the day, I was channel surfing and stumbled upon “The Soup” on E! which I love. They showed a clip of Rosie O’Donnell, as they have been doing every week for the past year since she joined “The View.”((E! has never had as much material for “The Soup” — what will they do when she leaves?))
Anyway . . . Rosie yammers a lot about menopause. Last week, she announced that she was sure she was in menopause because her “friend” didn’t visit her for several months and she even gave away all of her “stuff.” Then her “friend” came back for a visit and, according to her, brought about 45 people along for the fun.
Boy, can I relate.
In my case, six months of bliss were followed, three months or so back, by the return of my “friend” — with a vengeance. I can’t say that I wasn’t warned . . . I was. Several friends and co-workers told me to be ready because when I least expected it, I would be paid an unwelcome visit. Boy, were they right.
So you’d think I would have caught on sooner. This past weekend, I wanted to eat everything in sight. Everything. In. Sight. My usual snack items — rice cakes, Special K or South Beach Diet bars, yogurt, fruit — just weren’t cutting it. I wanted to have a binge the likes of which I haven’t indulged in for a long, long time.
Late Sunday evening, I realized why when my “friend” decided to drop in for a nice, long visit without calling first.
Hormones. The dreaded hormones. That explains why I wanted to not just overeat, but eat the wrong kinds of food. Food I haven’t had any desire to eat for ages. Food I walk right by in the grocery store without even a twinge of regret because I know the adverse effects it has on me.
So Rosie . . . I hear ya, sista friend. Loud and clear. “I get it.” This is my second such surprise visit from my “friend” after months between with no phone call, no e-mail, no telegram, no word at all. And I don’t know about you, but I hate it when people just drop in without calling first.
At least I figured out what was wrong and things have already improved. Today was a good day . . . I got totally back on track. I even did something I hadn’t done in ages: I made an omelet for lunch for myself, #1Son and Big Bob. It was so simple, but delicious: I diced up some 97% fat-free ham and threw it in with some shredded nonfat sharp cheddar cheese. 1 I would have added a tomato that BigBob grew in the backyard, but they are still a little too green.
- Don’t let anybody tell you the stuff has no flavor or doesn’t melt. Wrong on both counts. [↩]